I, John Khan the Don, Long John Fontaine, the Royal Falcon, the Light of Ozu, the Rashomon Bandit, none other than Mr. Motherfuckin’ Mighty Rhino, am honoured, delighted, chuffed to present you all with what is, next to “Company Policy”, arguably my finest hour on wax to date, my second album’s stirring, atom-smashing, galvanizing, electrifying, finna-run-right-the-fuck-outta-adjectives closer, “The Royal We”! Two minutes and twenty-four seconds of a raw, overpowering tour de force, 32 razor-sharp, devastating bars that take the “Mission Statement” formula and shoot it up at the stars, contemplating beauty, glory, truth, and ultimately the heavenly realms of God Himself. “The Royal We” is filth and joy, open blasphemy alongside the heights of reverence, Al-Hallaj cookin’ with the Based God; if I dare say so myself, it is a wonderful and mesmerizing and unforgettable rap song, and it deserves to be heard. #RhinoSalute. Much love to you all!
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Back with a sneak peak at the new album!
Hello Friends! I had a good day on my birthday, but the party ain’t over yet, my people! Oh no! I have uploaded no fewer than three songs from my smash hit second album, We Will No Longer Retreat Into Darkness, and they is now on the Cloud of Sound for your listening pleasure. Holy shit, wow! I’m so excited! I’m so happy you can hear:
-the gleefully ribald sex romp “The One You Need”, in which producer The Measuring Man executes the most perfect sample-flip of all time on one of my favourite soul songs, 1970s Chairmen of the Board smash “Since the Days of Pigtails”, and which features hip-hop’s only Steve Reich joke ever.
-the rip-roaring all-in-together-now posse cut “Basically Jesus”, featuring a staggering lineup of unfuckwithable rap talent rockin’ over a perfect slapper of a beat by the greatest producer in Canada, Digs; feminist rap legend Jesse Dangerously; Urbnet signee and man of letters I Am Joseph of the esteemed Newfoundland rap group ChessClub; the undisputed single greatest rapper of all time, More Or Les; and, as clean-up man, the rising Georgia phenom Cam James, whose work has been popping up on tv shows and shit – listen to how crispy this fuckin’ verse is, he ASSASSINATES it, it’s *insane*.
-and a song with THE MOTHERFUCKIN’ DUNGEON FAMILY, specifically Big Rube and Witchdoctor, an inarguable highlight of my career, entitled “‘Til the Lights Go Out”, on which I and these two immeasurably glorious legends of hip-hop (who need I remind you were on Atliens and Aquemini and Soul Food and Still Standing, AND ARE NOW ROCKING WITH MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE) explore love and justice and beauty and the good and the truth and let’s be real Witchdoctor kinda just says whatever he wants but I don’t mind it’s PERFECT because I MADE A SONG WITH BIG RUBE AND WITCHDOCTOR GODDAMNIT NO ONE CAN TAKE MY DEATHLESS UNEARTHLY OVERPOWERING JOY FROM ME OH SHIT whatever time I got left I’m holla an’ SCREAM DF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Upcoming show Oct 9 with iLLvibe!!!
Damn y’all! October is ’bout to be one of the best months yet for the Rhino! Toronto kingpin iLLvibe, rapper and video director par excellence, has invited Measuring Man and I to kill shit alongside Duch Dillinger on their Screwed Up Tour! It’s an official initiative of iLLy’s concert series #SOTI, Survival of the Illest. Joining us on the stacked, mega-talented bill will be Duch Dilly, party-starter Chris Thomas, the very dope Toronto OG street rapper Mark Jordan, Pinkush’n Kidz, Royce Birth, Jane Doe, and, last but not least, local godfather Dan-E-O of the amazing Golden Era Canadian rap legends Monolith! It all goes down Thursday, October 9th, at Nocturne, 550 Queen Street West! Come fuck witcha boy – it’s finna be a PART
Y!
Another dope guest verse:
for Rayne Drop this time.
Wow! Dope new Rhino tunes just keep comin’ y’all! I’m happy with this one – it’s a feature I did on a lark for my man Rayne Drop out in Saskatoon – he’s on the beat, Chuck Woods from his group Wolfpack is on the first verse, and I drop in for a nifty little cameo as the clean-up man, including (heads up to nerds!) references to no fewer than 12 rap and R&B acts (see if you can figure ’em all out!) and also (fair warning to Bahá’ís and other chaste folks!) a little light romantic tongue-in-cheek sex talk. “I never said I was a dog…”
More great Rhino raps:
a feature with Ziegler!
The latest excellent emcee to request and receive an atomsmashing guest 16 from yours truly is none other than Dopey Ziegler of San Jose, California, who was kind enough to ask me to feature on his banginary single “Tropicana”, a particularly funky cut on his triumphant new album with beatmaker Variant, ‘The Signal and the Noise’. I really assassinated this one, and Ziegler (formerly known as Swagberg) shines on the whole tape with precise, tightly wound flows and beautifully written trueschool raps. Dude is an absolute beast, and there are great performances by Navi, Satellite High and our old friend Jesse Dangerously as well. Peep game at www.ziegler.bandcamp.com!
Rhino smashes Nerd Noise Night!
What do you do when your friend More Or Les calls you out of nowhere to request your presencer as part of his set for the most famous and beloved nerd musicoriented concert series in town? You RIP THAT SHIT TO SHREDS, of course! I was thrilled to rock “Whaddup Witcha” and “Get Back” for a wildly enthusiastic nerd crowd at the Horseshoe Tavern on the night of Sunday the 31st, adding some A1 B12 energy and inimitable Rhino pizzazz as an extra boost to Les’ already brilliant set. Shouts as well to Nerds With Guitars, the amazing Detroit dance act Johnny Headband, and the Cybertronic Spree, who dress up in costume and exclusively perform the instrumental music from the animated ‘80s Transformers movie (I shit you not! I’m talkin’ a dude in bigass devil horns absolutely SHREDDING on the geetar! Amazing!)
ShareTriumph in Mississauga!
Holy shit! Measuring Man and I have had the good fortune to be on some great bills in the past, but this one was more stacked with talent than just about any we’ve yet been on. Kush McCloud and Simply Put of #TheNetwork were gracious hosts at Oko Red Lounge for the famous The Sauga Continues event, where we delivered a devastating set alongside an amazing group of talent including Young Stitch and Sentral Soldiers, Treetop Entertainment (Kehmak and Casper The Ghost), Dynamic, Jadio & Soul, and Hotrox Skren MC! Hard to pick who was best—Dynamic had the sick hooks and commanding stage presence, Hotrox had the “Irish Sticky Fingaz” charisma and slammin’ oldschool beats, Sentral Soldiers spit crazy fire, the Treetop boys smashed the place. Everybody ripped it! What an honour and pleasure to rock that crazy bill! And best of all—we’re comin’ BACK! The crowd chose us to headline the next Sauga Continues event! BAM! #RhinoSalute!
